It will be good

So, here's a question for you girls. What do you do when your friends, maybe even your best friends, seem to have different beliefs and convictions than you? I mean, aren't your Christian friends supposed to be on the same page as you? They go to the same church meetings as you, they hear the same messages, and they are involved in the same outreaches and ministry opportunities. So are you surprised when differences arise? I certainly was.

We are all created as different and unique creatures for God's glory. Yes, we are all created in the image of God, but he has given each one of us different gifts, talents, passions, and interests, all of which are designed to display his creativity and sovereignty. God brings relationships and friends into our lives for our happiness? Ok sure. Our enjoyment? Of course. His glory? Most definitely! And then there's this one--for our sanctification.

Our next "installment" of posts will focus on various relationships. I think you will come to find that no matter what specific relationship we are discussing, God intends for them to be a means of grace and sanctification in our lives, and this is not always easy.

So what do we do when we as friends have disagreements, arguments, even all out fights about our beliefs and standards? Maybe you can't identify with me on this yet, but trust me, you will soon. No friendship will be perfect, and not relationship continues without tensions arising from time to time.

See if you can identify with one of the following. Maybe one of your friends is allowed to watch movies that your parents won't let you see. Maybe your parents won't let you wear things that a certain friend wears all the time. Maybe you have a strict curfew and she doesn't. No matter the scenario, the heart issue is the same. Beware of jealousy, covetousness, and bitterness. These like to creep into our hearts so often. Don't let them! Fight off those thoughts girls! Pray earnestly for God to keep them captive!

Practical time: I went through a situation a few years ago where I had to stand up to one of my friends because we didn't agree on an issue. Neither of our parents were there, so I had to decide for myself which path I was going to take. I really found out what I believed in that moment. It would have been so easy to go along with "the majority" and respond to the conviction of the Holy Spirit later. But, by God's grace, I voiced my concerns to my friend and told her that these were my standards and I was going to uphold them. It was scary, I didn't want to do it, I was afraid of being ridiculed and looking stupid. But God's grace was with me, empowering me to actually live out my convictions. My friend and I realized that our beliefs on some issues were very different and that our friendship wasn't really producing the kind of fruit we wanted to see. So, we decided to take a major step back from each other and allow our relationship with God to grow stronger and really evaluate the fruit of our friendship. Guess what? We're still evaluating!

This wasn't easy girls. Sticking up for your convictions, obeying your parents, especially in your relationships with other believers, is very difficult. Trust me, I've been there, I'm still there, and I will be there for the rest of my life. Every friendship has a season...remember that.

God has given us relationships to enjoy yes. But he has also given us relationships to sanctify us and make us more like him. Sometimes this requires him taking away certain things, even friends, especially if they aren't healthy for your growth in godliness. God cares more about your heart than your popularity, and he will make sure that your relationship with him is most important. It has to be the most important. We have a choice here. When God chooses to give or take away, we have to choose to say, "Lord blessed be your name. You are sovereign and in control." Do you feel like God is taking things away from you? Bless his name. Do you think your parents are extremely strict and find it hard to obey their rules? Bless God's name for giving you parents that care so much about you. Everything God does is for your good. It's right there in Romans 8:28, "And we know that for those who love God, all things work together for good, for those who are called according to his purpose." Do you believe that? Then, live it out in your relationships.

This doesn't mean get rid of every friend that causes you to sin. That wouldn't be wise at all. God wants you to have relationships and good biblical friends. But I would encourage you to look at the fruit being produced from your friendships. Is there good fruit? Are your interactions focused simply on "having fun" or is godly conversation going on? Has this person brought you closer to Christ or farther away from him? These aren't meant to be judgmental questions against your friends, they are simply good questions to ask about every relationship you are in.

Put your relationships through an evaluating season every once in a while. This will reveal those friends that will help you grow to become more like Christ. Ask the Lord to reveal his will to you. And you know what? He will; and it will be good.

~Julie for the "TF" team