Modesty in How We Act

Let me just start off by saying that I'm NOT writing this because I'm good at this particular concept. In fact, I'm deplorable at it. Still, over the last few years God has really worked on my heart, and my actions naturally followed from this.

I always used to think that modesty only pertained to how we dress, but I remember hearing Kristin Jones say at Xtreme one year that it is so much more than that. (In fact, that was the Xtreme that Julie and I became friends. YAY!) She said that modesty is a heart issue, and out of the heart comes everything, from how we dress to how we talk to how we act. That message has still impacted me to this day, and I thank God for not only Kristin's words but how she lives out the concepts she was teaching. It only solidifies what I heard because I saw, and still see, her living it out.

So what is immodest actions? I remember wondering what that looked like, and asking God to reveal to me what they were. I can only tell you what He told me, and I don't think there is a solid answer to that question. We can glean from Scripture, certainly, but I think it's something that He has to reveal to you personally as well. Here's what He said to me.

Immodest actions stem from a heart that craves attention over glorifying God.

Jess touched on this in the last post, too. She confessed that as a child she enjoyed shocking people by what she said. Similarly, immodest actions crave the attention and accolade of people, not God, and this also can involve the "shock" factor as well. Let me give you an example.

I love playing basketball. I used to practice for hours in my backyard growing up, and then when we moved to Florida I would practice at Metro's gym. When we started the Wolverine's basketball program I was in my senior year of high school, and was thrilled that I could play with my friends on a team.

I found, throughout the season, that I really enjoyed the attention I got because of it. I was good at something, and people noticed. That brought me selfish pleasure and self-gratification. My desire in playing was not to glorify the God who gave me the skills in the first place, my desire was to receive the attention and accolade of people.

Perhaps you can't identify with a sports illustration, so here's another one. I grew up playing the piano and singing. My whole family is musical, and we often got called the "Von Phillips" instead of the Von Trapps. This also brought me a sense of self-glorification, even though the reference was to my family as a whole and not just me. I would tell people that we were referred to as the Von Phillips just so that people could know we were "talented", to use the word VERY loosely :-).

After hearing Kristin's message, and God revealing areas in my life where my actions depicted an immodest heart, God started to give me a desire to change. Granted, I heard the message before I played on the basketball team, but God graciously revealed that to me and reminded me of what I had heard and what He was teaching me. Does this mean that playing basketball, singing and playing the piano are immodest? Of course not. My HEART was, because I wanted attention, I wanted praise, I wanted to be noticed, I wanted to take God's place as the center of the universe.

So maybe, like me, you need to pray and ask God to reveal to you where you are acting immodestly. I'm sure it will not look very much like my own examples, but remember what Scripture says? Jesus, as in like the SON of GOD, said himself that "if I glorify myself my glory means nothing." I know, right? Crazy! If Jesus can say this how much more is it true for me and you! Paul also writes in Romans 15:5-6, "May the God who gives endurance and encouragement give you a spirit of unity among yourselves as you follow Christ Jesus, so that with one heart and mouth you may glorify the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ."

So let us be musicians, athletes, artists, daughters, sisters, and students who have one heart and mouth, which in unity praises and glorifies God and not ourselves.

Modesty Series: Modesty in our Speech

I know what you’re thinking: “Took long enough!” Yes, you’re feelings are justified. Our blog “schedule” has been rather out of wack lately. This is largely my fault, and for that I offer my sincere apologies.

As Janelle alluded to in her pre-Haiti post, we’re starting a new series today, one on modesty.

Now, while many people may have heard teaching on this topic before, many have not, and even if you have, we hope to offer some new perspectives on the topic that we pray will benefit you.

What exactly is modesty? I mean, if you had to define it, what would you say? Most dictionaries define modesty as lack of vanity, orderliness, simplicity, with a regard for decency in speech, dress and behavior. At the heart, modesty is a kind of humility which does not seek to aggressively gain other’s attention or admiration. So in the 19^th century, when someone called a man “a modest fellow” they were referring to the fact that the man had a humble attitude which did not put himself forward as more important than he really was. Modesty is a pleasant attribute because it causes those around you to feel at ease. They don’t feel the need to compete with you and don’t have to worry about how to respond to what is obviously an arrogant attitude. It puts your companions at rest. This broader concept of modesty should allow us to see the many ways which it can apply to our lives as Christian women. Modesty is a way of both rightly seeing ourselves as well as a way of loving those around us.

So, just to mix things up, this first post is going to consider, not modesty of dress (Julie will get to that on Monday) but rather modesty of speech. I don’t know about you, but ever since I was little I took great joy in making shocking statements when in a crowd (mischievous smile). There is something so pleasant about watching everyone gasp and look confused. I suppose it is similar to the desire to make people laugh. It’s a combined effort invoke a (positive) reaction in others, while also drawing attention to one’s self. Now, to be completely honest, I do not believe that there is anything inherently wrong with such desires. Everyone is made different: some of you would probably die of embarrassment if you said something which caused heads to turn, but some people are wired to enjoy attention. Such people are capable of doing things that most others are not, such as public speaking, street preaching, biblical confrontation, performance oriented tasks, etc. Just like all human characteristics, however, sin has the power to twist something such as an enjoyment of attention into something harmful to both ourselves and others.

If, like me, you tend toward the “shocker” speech, you might find yourself saying things that are inappropriate or not “fitting the occasion,” as Ephesians 4:29 puts it. Perhaps you tend toward crude joking, something which the Bible says should not be found amongst Christians (Ephesians 5:4-8). This sort of speech is often times a lack of humility and modesty—an impulsive action aimed at grabbing attention, but not taking into consideration whether the comment carries respect for the human body, for God’s design, for his view of sin, or the edification of those around you. Will your words cause others think about “whatever is true…honorable…just…pure” (Philippians 4:8)? If you tend toward patterns of immodest speech don’t be discouraged—there is a time and a place for playfulness and joking and wit; but spend some time with the Lord examining your heart to see if the way that you are exercising your power of wit is founded in biblical love for others and reverence and love for God.

Maybe you don’t struggle with getting people’s attention, but you are very desirous of other’s admiration, approval and good opinion. If this is the case you might be very quiet, but when you do speak you may try sound impressive, wise or smart. You may use sarcasm or irony to make yourself look better than other people. You may even gossip and slander in a way that shows how perceptive you are and how oblivious the people you are commenting on are. Slander is a some-what separate issue from modesty, yet the two can be related if the inappropriate speech about others becomes a tool you use to venerate yourself, compete with and exult yourself over others. You may even speak about yourself or your body in a way that makes other women feel uncomfortable, belittled or challenged to compete. But the Bible says that such "selfish rivalry" is demonic and contrary to the spirit of Christ. If you struggle in these areas, ask God to begin to show you when you are tempted this way; soon you'll see patterns and be able to change.

Remember, "anyone who does not stumble in what he or she says is a perfect person", a.k.a. no one can perfectly tame the tongue (James 3:2, 8), but with Christ's spirit of love in us we can learn to consider other before ourselves (Phillipians 2).

God calls us to speech that is gentle, kind, not arrogant or rude, not insisting on our own way, not irritable or resentful, not rejoicing at wrong-doing but rejoicing with the truth. That is, God calls us to speak lovingly to others (see 1 Corinthians 13:4-7). We are also called to purity of speech, and to edifying speech. For this reason, as women especially, let us “adorn” ourselves, as 1 Timothy and Titus say, with modest speech which does not seek to exult ourselves but to bless others.

“likewise also that women should adorn themselves in respectable apparel, with modesty and self-control, not with braided hair and gold or pearls or costly attire, but with what is proper for women who profess godliness—with good works.” 1 Tim 2:9

“Do not let your adorning be external—the braiding of hair and the putting on of gold jewelry, or the clothing you wear— but let your adorning be the hidden person of the heart with the imperishable beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which in God's sight is very precious.” 1 Peter 3:3-4

Let us be beautiful, but let us learn what true beauty is and adorn yourself with it in our speech as well as our actions.

~Jess

Haiti

I'm heading out to Haiti in Friday! I'm super excited...if you think about it please pray!

We will be starting a series on Friday on...hmm actually I'll let you come back and find out:-) Until then, enjoy this.

The World’s Funniest Real Ads

Believe it or not, these ads actually found their way into newspapers all over the world:

Braille dictionary for sale. Must see to appreciate.

FOR SALE BY OWNER: Complete set of Encyclopedia Britannica. 45 volumes. Excellent condition. $1,000.00 or best offer. No longer needed. Got married last weekend. Wife knows everything.

Help wanted, singer for rock band. Must be female or male.

For sale, Hope Chest, brand new, half off, long story.

Help wanted, adult or mature teenager to baby-sit. One dollar an hour.

Lost: small brown poodle. Reward. Neutered. Like one of the family.

Our sofa seats the whole mob and it’s made of 100% Italian leather.

Free puppies: ½ cocker spaniel, ½ sneaky neighbor’s dog.

Free puppies: part German Shepherd, part stupid dog.

German Shepherd, 85 lbs. Neutered. Speaks German. Free.

Tickle-Me-Elmo, still in box, comes with its own 1988 Ford Mustang, 5L, Auto, Excellent condition $6800.

--Janelle

Thinking Biblically about Music

Have you heard the little song that includes, "oh be careful little ears what you hear?" I'm sure that you if attended any Christian Bible school as a kid that you are familiar with it. Today I'd like to draw from this and highlight the importance of thinking biblically about what we listen to, especially in the area of music.

Those of you who know me know that music is a huge part of my life and has been since I was about 4 years old. I can't imagine my life without music, or without the ability to hear it. It is one of the most amazing gifts that God has blessed us with on this earth. Since I have such a love and passion for music it has been an area that I have had to watch very closely and receive input on.

Now, I'm not going to tell you what you should and shouldn't be listening to specifically. I don't have a list of "pastor-approved" songs or radio stations. I'm not going to tell you every song that is on my ipod, although I would suggest letting other's take a look at your music library to keep yourself accountable. My point is that we need to think biblically about what we are allowing ourselves to hear.

Think about this. What is the first thing you let yourself hear in the morning when you start your day? Do you just flip on the radio station or whatever CD is in your car as you drive to school or work? How often does what you listen to get stuck in your head? This happens to me all the time, and so often I find that if I have listened to a catchy song with unhelpful lyrics, I will sing it to myself the whole rest of the day, without even realizing what I'm saying. However, if I start with listening to a worship song or even a message, my mind is filled with truth about my Savior and I'm repeating that to myself instead. Now, I don't think I need to ask you which scenario is more helpful, and more glorifying to God.

I love music. I listen to all sorts of it. My music library is extremely diverse containing everything from Broadway musicals to R&B. But the Bible instructs us to glorify God in everything that we do...and this includes what we are listening to. It's our choice. What we listen to is not forced upon us...we make the decision for ourselves. So, what will you flood your mind with today? What will you be singing along to today? Songs about cheating, slander, gossip, sex, greed, etc? These are the types of songs that are being praised by our culture today, and trust me they will only get worse as time goes on. Why would you willingly set yourself up to listen to trash...literally it's garbage you guys. I'm guilty of doing this all the time, and when I'm left to myself I would much rather listen to Wicked than Danny's latest message from Sunday. But we have to guard our hearts. We have to ask for God's help. What we allow ourselves to listen to WILL be revealed through other areas in our life...in particular our speech and our actions.

Don't allow yourself to become numb to the garbage. See it for what it is. The next time you hear a song on the radio that is even slightly objectionable...turn it off. It takes some effort, it might even require you to "embarrass" yourself in front of your friends. You must decide if glorifying the Lord with what you listen to is that important to you. God intends for us to enjoy the world he has made and the gifts that he has given us. This includes music. God created it! He can be glorified through it and we can thoroughly enjoy it! But we must be careful about how close we come to the edge. Where are you drawing the line for yourself? Where is the gray area in your listening habits? If you can't identify it...ask someone else to do it for you!

We can't be legalistic about this. It has to be genuine. You have to care more about God's glory than the temporary pleasure you might get out of a "catchy tune". It's not worth it. No amount of music is worth defying God's commands. And he instructs us to keep ourselves pure and holy...undefiled before him.

Here's a challenge I want to propose to you all reading this. Try listening only to Christian music for a day. That's it...just a day! Turn on a worship song in the morning and listen to the whole thing. Sing along and pray through the lyrics of the song. Let it affect you. Throughout your day when you are able, play another one and do the same thing. I guarantee you will be constantly reminded of God's amazing promises and truth and that will change your attitude and your countenance. Are you up for the challenge? I would love to hear feedback from any of you that are doing this, or have done this.

If you love music as much as I do, we both need to see it as a gift from God. And we have the choice to honor him or not in what we are choosing to listen to. Indeed be careful little ears what you hear!

~Julie

We Have the Power

"Therefore let anyone who thinks that he stands take heed lest he fall. No temptation has overtaken you that is not common to man. God is faithful, and he will not let you be tempted beyond your ability, but with the temptation he will also provide the way of escape, that you may be able to endure it." 1st Corinthians 10:12-13

I was reading this a couple days ago and thought, "This verse is one of the best promises in the Bible." You know how you read something, or watch something, or hear someone say something and you just want to jump up and shout, or dance, or sing? I read this passage and want to do those things all at the same time. It resonates in my heart, it uplifts my soul, it causes my mind to be captivated by the extremity of God's love for me. Not only do I serve a faithful God who keeps my heart from being so tempted that I just HAVE to say yes to a particular sin, but He will always provide a way of escape from said sin.

How awesome is that? What struggles do you face, what sin comes crouching at the door to spring on you the minute you open up and you seem to always give in? Is it a requirement for you to say yes to this sin? Is the temptation so strong that there is no way you can walk away from it? My friends, if you are a Christian, you have all the power you need to say no to sin!

One sin that I have struggled with repeatedly over the years is temptation to bitterness. It seemed that every time a certain situation arose, or I perceived I was being treated a certain way, my heart would automatically go into "bitter" mode. It looked something like this. Someone would, to my perspective, leave me out of something they were doing. I would look and say, "They are doing that on purpose. Why do they treat me this way? How hard would it be to invite me to go along with them?" And on and on it would go, so that these resentful thoughts would churn in my heart until the seeds of bitterness dug deep. So, whenever I thought someone was leaving me out, I already had those seeds of bitterness in my heart, making it easier and easier for my mind to automatically think the worst of whoever was leaving me out. So out of this, not only did resentment and bitterness spring, but also anger, self-righteousness, and judgmentalism.

It was so easy to be bitter! It seemed like I couldn't say no. Yet because God is faithful, this lie that says "Every time you are left out you will be bitter, so just get used to it" can be vanquished by one simple thing. Saying no in the power of the Holy Spirit! It hasn't been easy, and it requires training my mind to recite what the Gospel is. The Gospel says that no matter what perceived offense there is against me, my offense against God is far worse. And because of that, Christ Himself had to bear my bitterness on the Cross so that God's wrath won't consume me. Not only that, but now that I have Christ's righteousness, I can say no when that temptation arises. He offers me a way of escape; not only that, He provided the way of escape by the sacrifice of His Son and the indwelling of His Spirit in my heart.

Let's be a generation that says "no" to sin, even what seem to be "little" sins or "respectable" sins. Or maybe your temptations arise in the form of "big" sins, like internet pornography or masturbation (as if those things required more of Christ's blood than my bitterness does!) The truth remains the same either way. You can say "no" because God gives you a way of escape, and He won't allow you to be tempted to such a degree that it is impossible for you to say "no." And one day, we won't even be tempted at all! As Paul writes later in 1st Corinthians 15:51-58:

"Behold! I tell you a mystery. We shall not all sleep, but we shall all be changed, in a moment, in the twinkling of an eye, at the last trumpet. For the trumpet will sound, and the dead will be raised imperishable, and we shall be changed. For this perishable body must put on the imperishable, and this mortal body must put on immortality. When the perishable puts on the imperishable, and the mortal puts on immortality, then shall come to pass the saying that is written:

"Death is swallowed up in victory. O death, where is your victory?
O death, where is your sting?"

The sting of death is sin, and the power of sin is the law. But thanks be to God, who gives us the victory through our Lord Jesus Christ.

Therefore, my beloved brothers, be steadfast, immovable, always abounding in the work of the Lord, knowing that in the Lord your labor is not in vain."


--Janelle

Thinking about Entertainment and Movies

If you meet someone, and there is this really awkward silence, let me make a suggestion: talk about a recent movie that came out. It covers for a lot of socially embarrassing situations, where a mutual friend introduces you to someone, you exchange pleasantries, and then you stare at each other and smile, not knowing what to say. Eventually there is the “uh, I gotta go talk to…” and you walk off saying “Nice to meet you.” Trust me, I’ve used this fool-proof strategy many times. Chances are, you have found common ground because EVERYONE likes watching movies. Plus, who in their right mind covers awkward moments by saying, “So, tell me about your sin?” Well, I can name like two people in my life who have done that, one is now a very close friend, the other was my middle school basketball coach at Covenant Life and had an influence on my life. I’m just saying…if you want surface relationships that don’t mean anything, if you want to talk about something completely frivolous without doing any hard work, if you are completely content with your friendships and don’t want any new ones, this is the perfect strategy. “So, have you seen (insert movie here) yet?” is bound to make for at least a 10 minute conversation. Then, the social duty done, you can leave the conversation patting yourself on the back for yet again reaching out to someone new.

This idea of entertainment is age old. The gladiators killed each other to the delight of roaring crowds. The Olympics have been a part of the Greek culture since it began, leading into our modern day obsession with star athletes. Christians were burned alive, called “human candles” to crowds that soon became very bored and demanded that they be killed by a lion, so at least they could see some action. The idea of “theatre” has been around a very long time, too. Ever heard of Shakespeare? He was a genius, and crowds flocked to his plays to watch daring swordfights, crazy madmen, romantic comedies, and every type of modern day genres you can think of. Nothing about the entertainment industry today, particularly movies, can be called original, except that we watch it more on digital screens than real life.

We are an entertainment driven culture. Everyone listens to music, yet doesn’t want to take the time to learn their own instrument. Everyone watches movies, yet doesn’t want to take the time to read a book. Everyone goes to theme parks, yet doesn’t take the time to study their homework. Everyone texts, has a Facebook, a Myspace, or Twitters, yet doesn’t want to invest in true biblical fellowship. As Jessica mentioned in the last post, God created us to be fully satisfied by Himself. Are these things lending themselves to drawing us closer to God? Which do you think does this more; a movie with Zac Effron, or a book by John Piper?

“Wait, Janelle. Are you saying that I can’t go and see a movie just for the sheer frivolity of seeing a movie? What’s wrong with being entertained?” If you are asking this question, you should ask yourself if you are looking for a way out. Obviously I will say that nothing is wrong with that. I am simply challenging the idea that, as young adults, we have to be constantly entertained. We ARE constantly entertained, and without much brain-power going into it. Listening to a bland country song about fried chicken is not wrong, but it also doesn’t stimulate your mind or draw you closer to God.

This is a challenge. On one hand, there are some pretty amazing movies out there that have really effected me. Movies like Amistad or Amazing Grace have instilled in me a hatred of slavery and an admiration for those who stood against it (side note: any reference I make to something I have seen is not necessarily a recommendation to go and see it!) Other movies like Defiance or A Beautiful Life have affected me regarding the injustice of racial or religious intolerance. Yet others like Mississippi Burning or The Long Walk Home cause me to be thankful that my kids won’t grow up being taught that they are somehow superior or better than others because they were born a certain skin color.

On the other hand, there are some movies that have absolutely no value to them. I watched Nacho Libre and laughed my head off, but was there any value to the two hours I spent looking at Jack Black being hilarious? How about movies that are provocative, or have a lot of language…you get what I’m saying.

I must say I’m not a very good example in this area. Far too often I choose a movie over what is important, like getting homework done or spending time with my family. So here is my challenge; next time you are bored, pick up a book instead of a DVD. Next time a movie comes out that looks really awesome, screen it before you see it. And if it doesn’t look edifying…don’t go see it! Or, at least wait until you can rent it and see it with your mom and dad. Next time your friends ask what you want to do tonight, suggest putt-putt or bowling. You might find that your friendships take on a new facet, or that your parents start complimenting you on how you are growing in your relationships with people, and not your knowledge on who is acting in what movie.

--Janelle

Thinking Biblically About the Internet - 2.0 Brains and a Relational God

This may be a strange way to begin this post, but eventually you’ll see where I’m going. I want to begin by talking about the female brain—in particular, the teenage female brain. Everyone knows that guys and girls tend to experience puberty differently—dah. But often we are unaware of the scientific realities behind these differences. Without facts, it becomes easy to simply stereotype or generalize, in which case mistakes and myths easily flair up. This is why I enjoy research—I like to find the truth behind the myths.

Anyway! One of the most recent books that my research has unearthed is The Female Brain by Dr. Louanna Brizendine. In it she explains all sorts of biological phenomena which define what makes us feminine, specifically neurologically and hormonally, and what that looks like in day-to-day life. In her first chapter she explains why, according to the most up-to-date research, there are less women pursuing careers in mathematics and science. It is not because of a lack of aptitude in these areas; rather, it is because of the hormonal changes that occur in puberty. During the high school years, when men and women begin to choose their career paths, the female brain is flooded with estrogen in such a way that its emotional and communication circuits grow, creating a strong desire for human interaction. On the other hand, male brains, during puberty, are flooded with testosterone, causing them to become less communicative and more interested in scoring points. Thus, secluding themselves in order to drill away at formulas becomes more difficult for women during this time, but easier for men. Both sexes are completely able to perform the task, but women are less inclined to have a desire to do so (Brizendine 7–8). Thus, women usually end up choosing professions which will facilitate more human interaction, while men have no problem thriving in less social environments. Similar hormonal processes occur in post-puberty/young adulthood, reinforcing these patterns.

What does any of this have to do with thinking Biblically about the internet? In our generation, the internet has been transformed by the invention of web 2.0, that is, by internet that is no longer “read-only,” but based on user participation and connection. Examples of web 2.0 include social-networking sites, video-sharing sites, wikis, blogs, mashups, folksonomies, and world-wide gaming like WOW. In other words, while the computer was originally no more than a gigantic calculator, processing numbers and formulas, now the computer and the internet is a portable gateway into an endless world of interpersonal communication—a woman’s paradise! I told you I’d get to the point :).

There are so many fun and fantastic features of the internet which women can enjoy. This blog, I hope, is a good example. It’s great to catch up with old friends, to stay in the loop with current social events, to chat with people you don’t get to see very often—even to send out mass prayer requests or scripture versus for encouragement. I personally love to look at and comment on my friends’ pictures. So there are a lot of great things we can do with the internet. And, we should also be aware that because our flesh is ever present and because our Enemy desires to use every opportunity to ensnare and harm us, there are also many common temptations and dangers with regard to the internet—specifically as women. In my opinion, and from personal experience, I believe that most of these temptations stem out of our good, but ever pervasive love for relationship.

Since the invention of IM, teenage women have been notorious for making some pretty serious mistakes on the internet. We’ve all heard the bed-time horror stories of what comes of giving your address to strangers. A more recent phenomena has been Myspace. Even college students were shocked when they first saw some of the things that younger girls were posting on their profiles—didn’t they realize how dangerous such behavior was? Yet who hasn’t experienced the temptation to post something a little too risky on their profile? Who hasn’t gone through the mental gymnastics of calculating who would see it, when, and how? It is a common temptation. On a more innocent level, who hasn’t simply desired to post details of their daily life through their status, hoping that a certain someone would care about how they were doing. Wow, we ladies some serious thinkers! You probably know what it’s like to log onto a chatting forum, just to see who’s there to talk to—maybe just to see if someone specific is there to talk to. Dr. Brizendine also explains in her book how during puberty, hormones increase a woman’s sexual drive. So in addition to looking for communication in general, we also desire someone to notice and admire us sexually. Wow, so many desires and cravings! Add to those cravings a sinful nature which does not always fear God or reverence the wisdom we’ve been given. No wonder we feel like we’re going crazy sometimes. No wonder the internet can become a mine-field of temptation many days.

The most important thing to remember as we think through all of this, though, is the fact that as women, GOD made us the way that we are. He created our bodies and our brains to function the way that they do—he made us relational; he gave us the desire to be loved; and he created the process of adolescent development. He also created us to be completely fulfilled and satisfied in Him, which means that no person, no event, no relationship, no conversation, no chatting and no networking can ever fulfill us to the point that we will be happy. Only He can. The root of sin is the lie that it something besides God can fulfill us.

Who can identify with this scenario: You’ve just spent hours on the internet, it’s late, you didn’t finish the work you were planning on accomplishing, and you feel like crap; yet for some reason, you still feel as if staying on the computer for a few more minutes just might make you happy. What is with that!? I’ll be honest—I’ve experienced this downfall a hundred times. By God’s grace I’ve come to realize that the reason I behave this way is because I’m so craving social interaction, so craving relationship, that I’m willing to search for it, even through a digital flat-screen. And yet, the truth is that the only place I will find deep and fulfilling relationship won’t be through people—digital or not—but in Jesus, my best friend, and my Father God. His love for me, his interest in my life, his care for my emotions, his desire to make me truly happy, are genuine and powerful. His ability to fill up every corner of my gasping heart with his Spirit is the salvation of my soul. Jesus died for my idolatry and sin, and he did it so that I could enjoy and benefit from an uninhibited, eternal relationship with Him. Remember what Jesus said?

“Father, the hour has come; glorify your Son that the Son may glorify you, since you have given him authority over all flesh, to give eternal life to all whom you have given him. And this is eternal life, that they know you the only true God, and Jesus Christ whom you have sent.” John 17:1-3

Guys, that’s what it all comes down to. Life. In him we live, and breath, and have our being. Jesus experienced death and separation from God so that we could be fully united to him in eternal life. Jesus has grafted us into him, so that we now dwell in him and are made one with him as we relate to him.

So, when we’re on the internet, let’s have a blast enjoying all the ways that we can indulge in and enjoy our friendships. Let’s laugh and smile and be goofy, coating everything with love and encouragement and wisdom. But let’s make sure that we never look to the internet for the fulfillment of our deepest desires, or hope in people to fulfill our need for relationship. When we’re tempted to log-on to a site because we feel lonely, sad, attention hungry, or hurt, let’s make a commitment to stop and look to our Father first: to wait for Him, to pray to Him, to make our requests known to Him believing for His gracious answer, to read His word, to simply enjoy His company and rest in His Love. Then, once we have done that, let’s pursue our friendships with people. People can even help us to seek out and become more satisfied in God; those are the best kinds of friendships—and hey, who said we couldn’t have them over facebook? :)

~Jess

Works Cited

Brizendine, Louann. The Female Brain. New York: Broadway Books, 2006.